Normal is Just A Setting On the Washing Machine

 

I’m through with self-help books

And shock treatment therapy

Analyzing my eyebrows to ensure conformity

I will wear blue when it’s the trend to wear green

‘Cause normal is just a setting on the washing machine

 

I don’t care if I was breastfed

Or that I’m not a Swedish model

I don’t believe that potty training

Could make me hit the bottle

The IRS doesn’t care if I keep my bedroom clean

Normal is just a setting on the washing machine

 

If you’re 46 and you can’t hold down a job

I sincerely doubt it’s because

you weren’t allowed to have a dog

A cat, a rat, or something like that

And it’s not God’s fault your tire had a flat

 

I’m sick of all discussions that blame everyone but you

For every mistake, misfortune you’ve had since you were two

It’s time you took a stand and claim responsibility

‘Cause normal is just a setting on the washing machine!